Weight does not mean energy which is what it takes to make recoil!
A higher weight bullet at a lower velocity imparts less energy and thus less recoil to the mechanism;
perhaps so much that it will not eject or reload properly.
Use "normal" 9mm parabellum rounds in 115 or 124gr commercial loadings, your particular luger may like one brand more than another.
It depends on many things, but perhaps most important is the strength of the recoil spring. A mark at the rear of the frame is normal and part of designed operation of the luger mechanism.
It does not really "slam" into the frame with proper ammo and springs and the recoil is nearly spent at that point.
Logger,
don't overthink it - millions of rounds have been fired through lugers without the shooter having any idea of what the cartridge was doing.
If you pistol is in good condition with original specification springs and has not been messed with or over stressed in the past it is fine. If it has been abused, there may be some evidence, but probably not. The luger is much more robust than many folks would have you believe. JMHO.