[ithacaartist]

Eugene's pig reminds me of a story about another pig.

A tire blew on a traveling salesman's car, and he came to rest at the end of a dirt lane which led to a distant farmhouse. The lane was flanked on either side by fields with stout fences to prevent the livestock from wandering. The salesman began the tedious process of changing a flat tire, opening the trunk, assembling the jack, liberating the spare from its well, etc. As he bent down to remove the lug nuts, he noticed that he was being watched by a large pig, which was attentive to his every move from the other side of the fence.

The man continued his labor. He placed the lug nuts he had removed one by one into the upturned hub cap, so that he could keep track of them. However, the spare tire that he had leaned nearby against the fender of the car, where it would be easily reached later, was not as stable in its placement as he had thought, and it rolled a few inches and fell over, landing on one edge of the hubcap. The hubcap flipped into the air, broadcasting lug nuts as it spun. The nuts were dispersed in the knee-high grass that bordered the road!

The man cradled his head in his hands, shaking it slightly, at the prospect of more trouble and lost time obviously necessary to locate even the crucial three lug nuts he would need. At this moment, he heard a grunt from the pig. He turned to see the pig hustle briskly a short distance down the fence, undo something with his snout, and emerge on the outside of the fence. The pig trotted up to the man, and with another grunt, turned to the roadside grass, and began sniffing and rooting. The pig raised its head, turned, and trotted over to the hub cap, where it dropped a lug nut. Moreover, the pig proceeded to produce the remaining four nuts in like manner.

The salesman stared in amazement as the pig did its work. Then he became puzzled, because he had noticed that a crudely made wooden leg was strapped to the left haunch of the pig. With a shrug, he returned to the chore of installing the spare tire. The pig went back through the fence and resumed its original vigil.

As the salesman was closing the trunk in preparation to leave, he was greeted by a farmer boy who had come down the lane. After exchanging pleasantries and briefly discussing the weather, the man launched into his tale of how the pig had helped him. Then, the salesman asked the young man, "Say, I see your pig has a wooden leg. What's up with that, son?"

"Well, sir, this is Elmer. And he is a Great pig!", the lad replied. "One time my uncle Henry fell into an old well out in the back 40," he continued. "Somehow, Elmer heard him yelling for help. He found John, the hired man, and dragged him by the sleeve all the way out there to rescue Uncle Henry!"

"Yes, amazing!" said the salesman, "But that still doesn't answer my question about his wooden leg."

"Sir, Elmer is a great pig!" he repeated, "Another time, my cousin Sally didn't come home from the woods for supper. In the pitch dark, Elmer went running out there, and in about ten minutes, back he came--with cousin Sally holding on to his tail!"

"Elmer is, indeed, quite the hero!" said the salesman, "But nothing you've told me explains his wooden leg. How did he get that?"

"I keep telling you, sir, that Elmer is a great pig! Last fall, Daddy said that Elmer was such a great pig that he didn't have the heart to kill him all at once!"